YOU”RE A MEAN ONE BERNIE THE WALL STREET GRINCH
(Semi Yiddish Version)(You’re a Mean One Mr. Grinch)WilliamBanzai7
Sing along link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPBS7dVrE1U
You’re a mean one, Bernie the Grinch You really know how to “filch” and steel,You’re a cuddly Ponzi scheming cactus, you’re a charming Wall Street “khazer”, Bernie the Grinch,You’re a big Palm Beach banana with a greasy black peel!
You’re an asset management “loch in kop”, Bernie the GrinchYour business is a “gelt” black hole almost as big as AIG,Your brain is full of “ferkakdeh” trades, you have garlic in your “fershtinkiner” soul, Bernie the Grinch,Investors shouldn’t have touched you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!
You’re a foul one, Bernie the Grinch,You say the dog ate your “bupkes” records,You have all the tender sincerity of a typical “filching” Wall Street “shnorrer”, Bernie the Grinch,Given a choice between the two of you I’d sooner drink bottled water from the East River!
You’re a rotten “$-c-hm*ck”, Bernie the Grinch,You’re the king of hedge fund scamster “dreck”,Your heart’s a rotten “gefilte” splotched with moldy purple spots, Bernie the Grinch,You’re a triple decker synthetic CDO and toadstool CDS sandwich with arsenic fee sauce on top!
You nauseate me, Bernie the Grinch,You’re a nauseous super Wall Street “momzer!”,You’re a crooked Alpha “schlockster” and you run a crooked “shandhoiz”, Bernie the Grinch,Your trading books are an appalling dung heap overflowing with the most disgracefulassortment of “chazere” rubbish imaginable mangled up in tangled up knots!
You’re a foul one, Bernie the Grinch,You’re a nasty wasty Wall Street “goniff”,Your heart is an unwashed “shmanta”, your soul is full of bogus “schmaltz”, Bernie the Grinch,The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote,“Shtunk, shtup, shlemiel”!
Bernard Madoff“Tsen shifn mit gold zol er farmorgn, un dos gantse gelt zol er farkrenkn.”Ten ships of gold should be his and the money should only make him sick.
— Posted by williambanzai7
Sunday, 25 January 2009
Sunday, 4 January 2009
Happy 2009 to all my readers
Welcome to 2009
2008 was the year I moved back to Nigeria from the UK. I stopped working at Network Rail Infrastructure Limited on Thursday the 1st of May 2008 and started working with Diamond Capital & Financial Markets Limited (DCFM) on Monday the 5th of May. Talk about in at the deep end.
For the past 8 months, I have been working non-stop as the Head of Principal Investments at Diamond Capital, responsible for historical equity investments made by Diamond Bank and all future investments made by Diamond Capital. I am responsible for investments in paint and resin factories, beer bottling plants, real estate developments, oil and gas servicing companies, road haulage and logistic companies, natural gas bottling plants, rice farms, car tracking companies, telecoms investments, health companies, catering companies – anything that moves and we can invest in for a good return, I am responsible for. I have become responsible for the structuring, the tracking, monitoring, logistics, legal issues, entry and subsequent exit from the investment…
No be small…
That is why I have been working from dawn till dusk over the past 8 months, working like a dog, chasing my tail. But, it is not sustainable. It can’t continue like this. It’s no fun and life had better be fun or you move on. I can’t continue to complain that I am in-undated by the sheer volume of work. 2009 is the year I have to take things forward. I have to make a change. I have to rise beyond carrying all the operational issues on my back, and start putting people in place under me to take care of the day-to-day running of this business. I can’t continue and do not derive pleasure from running a fire fighting business and I need to move to a more strategic level where I can add more value and vision.
I told my organisation at the team building event when I joined that I intended to work towards taking off on Wednesday afternoons to go and play golf. They looked at me with expectation. I still stand by this promise, and I haven’t changed from my expectation. I appreciate that I am in a great position of being able to pick whatever investment I believe can make money as long as I can defend the idea. It is a great position to be in. I have to make the most of the opportunity as such an opportunity for me to go off and place experiments with someone else’s money may not come walking off the street every day.
At the same time, I have to make time for developing strategy, I have to make time to develop strategic relationships both for the position I am in but also for my own career development. No man is an island as they say. I have every intention of making a success of what I do and I can’t do it successfully by continuing along the path I left in 2008.
So, welcome 2009, things are not going back to the way they were. I am no longer a baby in this country. Time to start to assert myself. Time to put my own plans in place. Time to make a change.
Munachi Okoye
2008 was the year I moved back to Nigeria from the UK. I stopped working at Network Rail Infrastructure Limited on Thursday the 1st of May 2008 and started working with Diamond Capital & Financial Markets Limited (DCFM) on Monday the 5th of May. Talk about in at the deep end.
For the past 8 months, I have been working non-stop as the Head of Principal Investments at Diamond Capital, responsible for historical equity investments made by Diamond Bank and all future investments made by Diamond Capital. I am responsible for investments in paint and resin factories, beer bottling plants, real estate developments, oil and gas servicing companies, road haulage and logistic companies, natural gas bottling plants, rice farms, car tracking companies, telecoms investments, health companies, catering companies – anything that moves and we can invest in for a good return, I am responsible for. I have become responsible for the structuring, the tracking, monitoring, logistics, legal issues, entry and subsequent exit from the investment…
No be small…
That is why I have been working from dawn till dusk over the past 8 months, working like a dog, chasing my tail. But, it is not sustainable. It can’t continue like this. It’s no fun and life had better be fun or you move on. I can’t continue to complain that I am in-undated by the sheer volume of work. 2009 is the year I have to take things forward. I have to make a change. I have to rise beyond carrying all the operational issues on my back, and start putting people in place under me to take care of the day-to-day running of this business. I can’t continue and do not derive pleasure from running a fire fighting business and I need to move to a more strategic level where I can add more value and vision.
I told my organisation at the team building event when I joined that I intended to work towards taking off on Wednesday afternoons to go and play golf. They looked at me with expectation. I still stand by this promise, and I haven’t changed from my expectation. I appreciate that I am in a great position of being able to pick whatever investment I believe can make money as long as I can defend the idea. It is a great position to be in. I have to make the most of the opportunity as such an opportunity for me to go off and place experiments with someone else’s money may not come walking off the street every day.
At the same time, I have to make time for developing strategy, I have to make time to develop strategic relationships both for the position I am in but also for my own career development. No man is an island as they say. I have every intention of making a success of what I do and I can’t do it successfully by continuing along the path I left in 2008.
So, welcome 2009, things are not going back to the way they were. I am no longer a baby in this country. Time to start to assert myself. Time to put my own plans in place. Time to make a change.
Munachi Okoye
Internet at home (at last)
I have to take the time to preach the virtues of my new Starcomms izap USB Modem. At last, internet at home and at a reasonable price of N6,500 per month for 100 hrs and at a pretty fast zapping speed. Not bad at all. It means I can update my blog from the peace and quiet of my study rather than from the controlled chaos of my working day. Fantastic.
Saturday, 3 January 2009
An ode to my FT
An ode to my FT
For any of my readers who have been following me on my blog over any length of time, you know that I often spend my Saturday mornings reading my one week old Weekend FT (it arrives on the Monday after the weekend and I don’t have time to savour it till the following weekend). So, here is an ode to my darling FT;
What else would combine my love of high finance with my other loves of Life & Arts (insert) and House & Home (another insert) with the additional luxuries of FT Magazine and "How to Spend It" thrown in. In the harsh hyper-real environment of Lagos, Nigeria, you need all the luxury you can get to take you away from the harsh realities of the working week.
I love the off-beat columns such as Harry Eyres column on the Brockwell Lido and the volunteer community of London, a totally different world from the one I am currently in. I love the variety of cultural offerings – food, wine, restaurants, architecture, drama, theatre, books, films, music, all the offerings one needs to feed their soul.
I’ll continue to read the FT for as long as it has a grip on me. I’ll pass it onto my kids to read it as well. It’s currently my lifeline to the greater world of which I am happy to belong and I truly appreciate the wide variety of skill and talent that goes into putting the FT together week after week. Well done FT, keep up the good work.
Munachi Okoye
For any of my readers who have been following me on my blog over any length of time, you know that I often spend my Saturday mornings reading my one week old Weekend FT (it arrives on the Monday after the weekend and I don’t have time to savour it till the following weekend). So, here is an ode to my darling FT;
What else would combine my love of high finance with my other loves of Life & Arts (insert) and House & Home (another insert) with the additional luxuries of FT Magazine and "How to Spend It" thrown in. In the harsh hyper-real environment of Lagos, Nigeria, you need all the luxury you can get to take you away from the harsh realities of the working week.
I love the off-beat columns such as Harry Eyres column on the Brockwell Lido and the volunteer community of London, a totally different world from the one I am currently in. I love the variety of cultural offerings – food, wine, restaurants, architecture, drama, theatre, books, films, music, all the offerings one needs to feed their soul.
I’ll continue to read the FT for as long as it has a grip on me. I’ll pass it onto my kids to read it as well. It’s currently my lifeline to the greater world of which I am happy to belong and I truly appreciate the wide variety of skill and talent that goes into putting the FT together week after week. Well done FT, keep up the good work.
Munachi Okoye
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