wii
Just tested my body mass index (BMI) on our new fangled Nintendo wii. Very very very cool machine. I think I read somewhere that Ninetendo was the most profitable company in the world per employee head. I can see why. Fantastic merger of technology and content. Just like Apples ipod. I have a BMI of just over 25 by the way…
Tuesday, 28 October 2008
How to get a good driver
Your Island Driver
Dear all, in this short space of time, I am already on my second driver, and although under no circumstances do I believe I can call myself an expert at interviewing drivers, I do believe I have an observative mind and can provide you the reader with a road map to avoid the pitfalls in taking on a driver who will add to your already existing Lagos stress. Please read and remember. You have been warned. Here goes;
1) Drivers, just like any other profession come in all shapes, sizes, shades, levels, emotional persuasions, levels of scruffiness or tie and suit wearing dressiness etc. I prefer a driver who has a happy heart rather than one who you cannot read what is going on behind a bland exterior or one who has a face like thunder when you see them in the morning(you may have a psychotic mad man driving you around, be warned)
2) Only employ a driver who knows the area around where you live and work and can drive the backstreets. You need someone who can get you past traffic hotspots in 10 minutes rather than 2 hrs (I talk from experience)
3) Your driver will always say that he has driven in your area for the past 10 years and can drive blind folded. Do not believe him. He has probably driven through your area once in 10 years and knows it less better than you who has just come. Warn him that if he is lying you will sack him on the spot. That should get the truth out of him.
4) You do not want a driver that drives like a little girl (sorry all the little girls who are good drivers out there). I had a driver that everyone would pass on the road, who would run to the other lane when anyone cut in and who other drivers used to horn before overtaking in a cloud of dust. I told him he drove like a woman and he went on to almost hit someone trying to prove he could weave through traffic the way Mohammed Ali weaves in the boxing ring. That was the last day he drove me. He was psychotic and I was more afraid of him than he was of me. Not a good thing to have with a driver.
5) You do want a humble driver who is grateful for employment. Do not get a driver who believes he is doing you a favour by taking your measerly N30k (average Island driver price). My last driver felt I should share my salary 50/50 with him as it was obviously more in my interest than his to stay with me. He benchmarked me against what oil companies and banks pay their corporate drivers and I was found wanting. We unfortunately parted ways and I hear he is now sitting around dreaming of the big time. He wanted to come round and see my family but he could be equally psychotic and I don’t want anything more to do with him.
6) Do not employ a driver that does not provide standard drive etiquette. Carry out the bag test. I was testing a driver to see if he would take my ruck sack from my back and carry it for me. He walked in front of me to my car as if he was the Oga and I was the driver. He had asked me earlier what car I drive to be sure I would fit into his corporate driving image. He obviously did not get the job.
7) You need a driver that is tough enough not to be fazed by the “wetin you carry, show us your particulars” police, the Lagos “Last Chance” LASTMA, and assorted armed robbers, area boys and other folk that would like to seperate you from your money and your phone and that you have to steer past or run over on your daily commute to and from home. Do not worry, choose your driver well and he will be your look out while you sleep in the back seat of your car. These assorted folk add variety and spice to your Lagos life anyway, so do not knock them.
8) Finally, the most important thing is to employ someone with a good heart who will not let you down in your time of need
Take care and good luck.
Dear all, in this short space of time, I am already on my second driver, and although under no circumstances do I believe I can call myself an expert at interviewing drivers, I do believe I have an observative mind and can provide you the reader with a road map to avoid the pitfalls in taking on a driver who will add to your already existing Lagos stress. Please read and remember. You have been warned. Here goes;
1) Drivers, just like any other profession come in all shapes, sizes, shades, levels, emotional persuasions, levels of scruffiness or tie and suit wearing dressiness etc. I prefer a driver who has a happy heart rather than one who you cannot read what is going on behind a bland exterior or one who has a face like thunder when you see them in the morning(you may have a psychotic mad man driving you around, be warned)
2) Only employ a driver who knows the area around where you live and work and can drive the backstreets. You need someone who can get you past traffic hotspots in 10 minutes rather than 2 hrs (I talk from experience)
3) Your driver will always say that he has driven in your area for the past 10 years and can drive blind folded. Do not believe him. He has probably driven through your area once in 10 years and knows it less better than you who has just come. Warn him that if he is lying you will sack him on the spot. That should get the truth out of him.
4) You do not want a driver that drives like a little girl (sorry all the little girls who are good drivers out there). I had a driver that everyone would pass on the road, who would run to the other lane when anyone cut in and who other drivers used to horn before overtaking in a cloud of dust. I told him he drove like a woman and he went on to almost hit someone trying to prove he could weave through traffic the way Mohammed Ali weaves in the boxing ring. That was the last day he drove me. He was psychotic and I was more afraid of him than he was of me. Not a good thing to have with a driver.
5) You do want a humble driver who is grateful for employment. Do not get a driver who believes he is doing you a favour by taking your measerly N30k (average Island driver price). My last driver felt I should share my salary 50/50 with him as it was obviously more in my interest than his to stay with me. He benchmarked me against what oil companies and banks pay their corporate drivers and I was found wanting. We unfortunately parted ways and I hear he is now sitting around dreaming of the big time. He wanted to come round and see my family but he could be equally psychotic and I don’t want anything more to do with him.
6) Do not employ a driver that does not provide standard drive etiquette. Carry out the bag test. I was testing a driver to see if he would take my ruck sack from my back and carry it for me. He walked in front of me to my car as if he was the Oga and I was the driver. He had asked me earlier what car I drive to be sure I would fit into his corporate driving image. He obviously did not get the job.
7) You need a driver that is tough enough not to be fazed by the “wetin you carry, show us your particulars” police, the Lagos “Last Chance” LASTMA, and assorted armed robbers, area boys and other folk that would like to seperate you from your money and your phone and that you have to steer past or run over on your daily commute to and from home. Do not worry, choose your driver well and he will be your look out while you sleep in the back seat of your car. These assorted folk add variety and spice to your Lagos life anyway, so do not knock them.
8) Finally, the most important thing is to employ someone with a good heart who will not let you down in your time of need
Take care and good luck.
Thursday, 16 October 2008
Saturday Morning II
Saturday Morning 11/10/08 10.10am
I haven’t been writing frequently. I am sure everyone has given up on me. I am probably writing for myself now. Which is not bad bcos I can write what I like, a personal diary on the web, without the fear of anyone reading it.
It has been quite a journey coming back to my home country Nigeria. Starting with living in a big empty house with no fridge, no mosquito net, loads of pet mosquitoes and cockroaches to share the house with, a new job, new environment, new way of working, different culture, everything new. VERY VERY VERY CHALLENGING.
Now it’s a Saturday morning, my family is with me, I’m playing my music on my iPod connected to the stereo, I’ve got my one week old FT Weekend to read about some new banks failing, it’s raining outside, very peaceful inside, can’t go out because of possible flare up caused by local elections, I’m surrounded by the family and family belongings, work coming under some semblance of order. We are not quite there yet, it still takes me an hour to work and two to return, I still wake up 5am to get to work for a 7am – 7pm day to get home at 9pm, my Oga still bawls me out (in Nigeria, you have a licence to bully any unfortunates under you), but we are getting there.
I thought it would take about 2 years before my missus agrees that coming here was a good idea but she agreed after 2 months (Alleluyah!!!). We are getting there, gradually but we are getting there
I haven’t been writing frequently. I am sure everyone has given up on me. I am probably writing for myself now. Which is not bad bcos I can write what I like, a personal diary on the web, without the fear of anyone reading it.
It has been quite a journey coming back to my home country Nigeria. Starting with living in a big empty house with no fridge, no mosquito net, loads of pet mosquitoes and cockroaches to share the house with, a new job, new environment, new way of working, different culture, everything new. VERY VERY VERY CHALLENGING.
Now it’s a Saturday morning, my family is with me, I’m playing my music on my iPod connected to the stereo, I’ve got my one week old FT Weekend to read about some new banks failing, it’s raining outside, very peaceful inside, can’t go out because of possible flare up caused by local elections, I’m surrounded by the family and family belongings, work coming under some semblance of order. We are not quite there yet, it still takes me an hour to work and two to return, I still wake up 5am to get to work for a 7am – 7pm day to get home at 9pm, my Oga still bawls me out (in Nigeria, you have a licence to bully any unfortunates under you), but we are getting there.
I thought it would take about 2 years before my missus agrees that coming here was a good idea but she agreed after 2 months (Alleluyah!!!). We are getting there, gradually but we are getting there
Saturday Morning
Saturday Morning 04/10/08 8.52am
A nice peaceful morning. I worked till about 9pm in the office last night preparing papers for a Monday board meeting. I’ve had a bout of Malaria over the last few days so I am forced to slow down and take life easy. Hence, I find myself this morning writing my blog (offline), reading my last week’s FT Weekend subscription (it comes in on the Monday and I don’t have the time to read it till the following weekend) and playing with my young ones.
It’s a nice peaceful morning, the early morning Nigerian sun is out, madam has happily gone for a PTA meeting and I have the whole weekend ahead of me. Right now is alright.
A nice peaceful morning. I worked till about 9pm in the office last night preparing papers for a Monday board meeting. I’ve had a bout of Malaria over the last few days so I am forced to slow down and take life easy. Hence, I find myself this morning writing my blog (offline), reading my last week’s FT Weekend subscription (it comes in on the Monday and I don’t have the time to read it till the following weekend) and playing with my young ones.
It’s a nice peaceful morning, the early morning Nigerian sun is out, madam has happily gone for a PTA meeting and I have the whole weekend ahead of me. Right now is alright.
Thank You
The unfamiliar is gradually becoming familiar
I thank you for enjoying my blog.
Have a great day
Munachi Okoye
I thank you for enjoying my blog.
Have a great day
Munachi Okoye
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